Forest Bathing

Shinrin-yoku in Japanese, Sanlimyok in Korean

The term "forest bathing" refers to short visits to a forest for the purpose of relaxation and stress management.  In Japan this is a largely recognized form of therapy compared to aromatherapy.  Before I knew there was a term for it I always believed that time spent in nature, particularly wooded areas was therapeutic and I use it as a part of my life.

For example:  It's a busy morning getting kids ready for school,the toddler is having one of her oh-so-lovely days, you didn't sleep well the night before, and you are simply feeling grumpy- for lack of a better word.    
Solution: Pack a quick lunch, buckle the kids up in the van and head 20 minutes down the road to the conservation area.  Go for a walk in the woods, have a picnic lunch.  The result:  everyone, especially mommy, feels calm, relaxed and happy.  The toddler is tired and ready for a nice long nap and the older boy is ready for some quiet games while baby sister sleeps.

Another example:  Again, a busy day (because what day is not busy), kids were crazy all day, housework dominated the afternoon, you and hubby got into an argument.  You are feeling frustrated, overworked, unappreciated.
Solution: Put the kids to bed, find some trees and go for a walk.  Spend the time alone to clear your mind not to plot revenge and/or escape.  I guarantee you will come home a happier person.

Granted, going for a wooded walk will not solve all your life's problems but since we can't always make it in for a massage, or get away for a yoga class this is an easy way to wash away some of the stress that overtake us from time to time.  A relaxed, happy person is much better equipped to face the challenges that life throws at us, so go for a walk!

 

Childhood

I recently read a book about childhood, more specifically about that time in ones life that teeters on the edge of innocence and cynical adulthood.  It's called Lullabies for Little Criminals by Heather O'Neil and it was recommended by a friend of mine. (Thanks Carolyn!  Great book!)  I mention it here because it has me thinking about the magic of childhood.  For those of  you who have read the book, or will read it you may think I'm a little crazy that it has led me to think about the wonderful things of childhood because the book itself is rather dark and sad...but for that reason it demonstrated the beauty of innocence and how too often it is stolen much too soon.

When I sit back and watch my kids at play and participate in their games I witness genuine kindness and goodness.  I truly believe that children are innately good and see good around them.  It has not yet occurred to the them that people can be deliberately mean and ugly, and when they do experience this it shocks them to the point of tears.  How many parents out there have had their child run to them crying and proclaiming "Jimmy" was mean to them?  As adults when someone is less than kind we shrug it off, because unfortunately we've seen enough of it that it is no longer surprising...still hurtful, but not surprising.

I learn from kids all the time, and not just my own but other children in my life and children I meet in passing.  I know we can't hold on to the naivety and innocence of childhood forever but I will do my best not to steal it from my kids or let others still it from them.  So play on kids!

Love Story in Big Heads

If I were to create an album that told the story of my love with Christopher it would mainly be in big head pictures.  Before we were parents we took big-heads because we were often in a position where no one was around to take the picture for us.  Now that we are parents we realize we never take pictures of just the two of us anymore; therefore, in a spontaneous moment here and there we turn the camera around a snap a photo of the two of us together.  So here it is, our love story in big heads:

Windsor 2005 - When I was still Tasha Tower

Waterloo 2005 - Still a Tower, but not for long...

Stoney Creek 2005 - Our Wedding Day!

Toronto 2007 - Baby #1 arrives and a new love story begins.

New Years Eve 2007 - First full night away from baby

Somewhere outside of London, Ontario 2008 - Baby #2 on the way!

Niagara Falls 2010 - From two to three to four...but we're not done yet!

Milton 2012 - Baby #3 and it's a girl!

Milton 2013 - Now that we have three kids, eating dinner without them is very exciting.

Burlington 2013 - We don't get out much these days so when we do we tend to let loose.  Here we are dragging our friends into our Big Head world.

New Orleans 2013  - This is us making the most of a rainy, final day in Louisiana.

To be continued....

Reality Check

If you happen to have been at the Winners in Milton, Ontario this past Tuesday morning you may have seen a very confident, well-manicured mom with her lovely, well-behaved toddler walking sweetly beside her.  This mom was put together nicely with a pretty, spring scarf and crisp, dark jeans.  She was even carrying a latte in one hand while the other was holding the hand of her happy daughter. 

But please don't look too closely, for if you do this mom's secrets will be revealed.

Her pretty scarf has crusty snot on it because she forgot tissues for her daughter who has a cold.  The daughter also has a smear of old boogers across her cheek from her own attempts to clean herself.  The happy, well-behaved toddler's red eyes also give away the tantrum she had moments earlier at the van which explains why she is walking and not being pushed in her stroller like the mom wanted.  Once again the 18 month old wins the fight.  This same mom will return home soon and hang her scarf on the hook in the front hallway, forgetting it is soiled and most certainly will wear it again even after she remembers the snot.  She will also change out of her "good" jeans and exchange them for her "good" jogging pants.  The latte is long forgotten and now she is having a lunch that consists of the crusts of a peanut butter sandwich and half-eaten cucumber slices while standing over the sink.  The rest of her day will not be browsing through shops but most likely will involve wiping bums, cleaning something (although not well), and retiring to the couch exhausted by 8pm.  Not to mention that before the day is over every member of her household will have farted on her. 

Yes, this was my Tuesday. 

The point of this little story is to demonstrate that things aren't always as they seem.  I would argue that moms are guilty of comparing ourselves to other moms often to be critical of ourselves.  This mom business is a messy one although we may appear to have it all together we most likely do not, or at least not always.  I have great moments when my kids will be on their best behaviour and all of my clothes that I am wearing are clean and I will be looking really calm and cool, and those moments are real, but they are not the norm.  I can often be found in truly unclean clothes while all three of my children are screaming (not joyfully) and I am anything but calm and cool.  We should make a collective agreement to stop comparing ourselves to all the other moms and instead develop some universal signal that says, "This is my moment to have it all together, you'll have yours soon and I'll be a mess again".