Soundtrack

A song, good or bad, has the power to transport a person to a another time and place.  I recently heard a song on the radio that had me sitting in grade 6, my friend Lisa by my side, wearing my white denim overalls.  Extreme's More Than Words has that kind of power over me.  There are others as well.  Radiohead's Creep takes me to grade 9 in the cafeteria where the AV Club blared it everyday for a week.  I find myself dancing around my residence hall in first year university when I hear I Feel Like a Woman by Shania Twain (I shared a floor with some wild and wonderful women from the country).  When I hear Bedouin Soundclash's When the Night Feels my Song I think of my wedding day.  It wasn't played during the reception and holds no real significance for the day, but it was playing on the radio as we drove to the ceremony. 

Some songs and/or albums from my past are very pivotal.  The Barenaked Ladies album, Gordon, was the first compact disc I ever bought, making Brian Wilson a part of my history....like it or not.  That initial purchase led to many a pay cheque from Orange Julius to be spent at Sunrise Records. Other albums have acted more like background music, such as Creedence Clearwater Revival.  It seemed they played constantly throughout my childhood leaving me with a score of music to remember my crazy family days when I still lived with my parents and brother.  I am grateful for that.  When I am feeling nostalgic, I know exactly what to do (or rather play) to take me back to a moment of my life I care to think about. 

Music is important in our household; therefore, I am certain I will add some good songs, and some bad songs to my life's soundtrack.  But even if music isn't something you spend a lot of time or energy thinking about I am confident there are songs out there that mean something to you, or evoke a memory.  I am curious what songs stand out.  

To Work or Not to Work...

Making the decision to stay at home with my kids for me was an easy one.  Ever since my first child was born I have been plotting to find a way to make it happen.  Now that I am at home (with a part-time job) I couldn't be happier.  Life at home is more relaxed and balanced.  Work, while necessary, has become almost fun.  Although this was a choice that I feel fortunate to have the opporunity to make, and although I know I have many years ahead of me to put that university degree to good use, I still feel apologetic sometimes.  As if somehow I've let down the women before me that paved the way for my generation to conquer the world.  On the flip side of that I also find myself critical of women who have chosen career over stay-at-home bliss.  Who am to I to criticize anyone?  I think that we, both working mothers and stay-at-home mothers, should be supportive of those choices.  Afterall, isn't the fact that we have the choice the important part?  At the end of the day the kids will be alright.  We need to stop the guilt, stop the apologies and feel good about our choices.

This "soap box" rant is a product of reading.  I came across an article in the Globe and Mail this weekend that is worth the read.

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/commentary/alternative-advice-to-high-flying-women-lean-back/article10199024/

 

I Miss My Dog

A visit to my friend at her new house today left me thinking about dogs.  She has a dog, her brother who was also visiting has a dog, my dad texted me on the way about a dog he wants....it was a day of dogs.  I recently lost my lovely, goobery bulldog and miss him terribly.  Life has adjusted without him but days like today bring back all the great memories but also the heartache of losing him. 

For all the dog people out there I know you get it.  I've included some pictures of our handsome Harley hoping to make someone smile.  Give your dog a kiss and a snuggle tonight. 

Mommy Reads Too!

My reading log these days mostly includes  Lego City, Ninjago, and Mighty Machines.  I make sure we spend some time on the classics like Goodnight Moon and I Love you Forever as well.  Reading with kids is great, we should all do it but if you are thinking of adding some adult material to the list, I'd like to recommend some great reads.  Below is a list of five books I've enjoyed and hope you will too.  This list is in no particular order and includes long-time favourites and new finds.  Happy Reading!

1. The World According To Garp by John Irving

If you are looking for a book that you can pass on to the man in your life, this is it.  This book is on my husband's list of favourites as well.  It is a novel that takes it's reader on a journey through happiness, sorrow, and sometimes horror.  I was mesmerized by this book and will be sure to return to it again and again. 

2.  Sarah's Key by Tatiana De Rosnay

This book was recently recommended to me and I am glad I followed through with it.  The story is heart-wrenching so be prepared to feel pretty low at times, but it is a topic that deserves attention.  The novel itself is well written but simple enough to read quickly, or in short increments without getting lost. 

3.  The English Patient by Michael Ondaatje

There is something about this book that keeps me coming back.  It is wonderfully rich and complicated. The first time I read this novel I fell in love with the story.  The second time I read it I fell in love with the language.  It is so beautifully written it's poetic. 

4.  Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood by Rebecca Wells

This is a very recent read for me at a very timely moment.  The story is set in Louisiana and I so happened to read it while in Louisiana, which may be why it resonated with me.  It is a story of love amongst women.  It delves into the complicated relationships between mother and daughter, but also the deep bonds of female friendship. 

5.  The Glass Castle by Jeanette Walls

I love a story written from the prespective of a child.  I love too a great story of resilience.  This book is even more powerful because it is a memoir.  A book worthy of your time.

Not-a-mom Moment

Most of my days are consumed by child related activities. Everything from making lunches, changing diapers, driving to swim lessons....the list really does go on and on. I knew what I was signing up for when I decided to have children so this is not a rant, nor is it a complaint, simply a statement of facts. Because my days are filled with mommy things I like to sneak in time everyday that is just for me. I call them my "not-mommy" moments. Yesterday my moment came quite late when everyone was in bed, but I managed to get in before the day was over. It's not often I get the TV to myself. I'm not a huge TV watcher so this is fine with me, but I must admit every now and then I appreciate the freedom to watch whatever I want. Last night I sat on the couch with a cozy blanket, a glass of wine in my hand and watched some mindless TV. I can barely remember what I watched but it kept me interested for an entire hour. I did not have to get up off the couch once, answer anyone's questions or negotiate the channel. I realize I am not writing mind-blowing, insightful stuff here, but I truly believe it's the small details in one's life that count in the end. I can't make it to the spa everyday so I take my mini "not-mommy" moments and enjoy them.

Why Blog?

Blogging is like journaling, except people can read your entries.  With that in mind, I will be careful what I write but will also be as candid as possible.  I want to write about being a mom, rather trying not to be a mom.  Let me explain.  Since entering the all consuming, exhausting role of "mom" I have struggled with trying to hold on to the self I left behind.  And I as muddle my way through the early years I find myself wanting to find her again and also plan for who I want to be when I get to the other side.  I love being a mom, it's often magical, but I also miss just being Tasha.  When I say "get to the other side" I understand motherhood is a lifelong commitment, but a time will come when my children will need me less.  They will venture out into their own worlds and I will be given more time to continue my own personal adventure.  I vow not to be swallowed whole by motherhood, but to embrace it, enjoy it, and sometimes sneak away from it.  This blog will be my journal of returning to pre-mom, and planning for post-mom while simultaneously relishing the now-mom.